“Don’t be afraid to take a wrecking ball to your life in order to redesign it” is bold advice, but completely fitting and even, sometimes, necessary.
Middle age and personal disappointments provide a wonderful impetus for evaluating my life. Having just turned 52 this past week, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting, myself. Am I doing what I want to do? What I value? Where do my daydreams take me? What do I want to be when I grow up?
There’s an image that keeps coming to me – I’m looking out the window across a green lawn, shaded with large trees, and looking at an expanse of water – a Sound, perhaps, if not the ocean. Where is it? I feel as if I’ve seen it before, perhaps on my way to Ocracoke, but I’ve never been inside a house that overlooks so much water.
What in-between steps can I be taking to make my dreams a reality? If I need something pretty to look out at while I work, what can I do on my own to give myself a pretty view?
I’ve taken the wrecking ball to one dimension of my life – one that meant a great deal to me, meant more than I can tell anyone, but that simply had to be left. It doesn’t hurt as badly as one might think. Oh, yes, it’s scary, and there’s a bit of grieving that goes along with it… but there are compensatory graces: I know I made the right and responsible and honorable choice, and I know this “amputation” will allow me to draw closer to what I really want to achieve during the time God has given me in this life – and, consequently, to what I want in the life of the World to come.
There’s no virtue in being a victim, having one’s life scripted by people who want only their own good, their own convenience and pleasure. God gives us a great deal of free choice and the opportunity to make good each and every day.
Be bold. Be adventurous. No one else can do it for us.